Friendship is weird. Out of billions of people on this planet, I choose you to spend time with. I choose you to call for coffee, music, grocery shopping, Netflix. How do we choose each other? Biological family isn’t chosen. I’m kinda stuck with you. But friendships are truly a freewill experience of love and companionship. As a Christian, I believe our family is given to us to understand how to love when we don’t necessarily want to. My parents, my priest, are all in my life to learn obedience to someone outside of myself. That’s important. (In a healthy relationship, it’s important. In an unhealthy relationship, it’s detrimental and horrible and should be pushed away as soon as one is able. That’s not what this post is about however, but I do recognize that it’s a possibility and sadly, a common possibility at that.) It’s important because if I can obey my parents, my priest, it’s a step in the direction of obeying God. That’s part of being a Christian. I’m not very successful in that part to be honest with you. 

But friendship? Why do you exist? Either of us can walk away at any point. Sometimes people do walk away, for good or bad. Sometimes they stick. But why do we stick through it? Friendships can be painful for so many reasons and yet, here we are, pushing our way through life together again. Sometimes it’s easier without you, dear friendship. Sometimes I don’t want to work through our problems. Sometimes I don’t want to be honest with you. Sometimes being fake and closing myself off is easier. Sometimes letting you keep your walls intact is easier than breaking them down. 

I’m really bad at keeping plants alive. Human beings, cats, I got you. Human beings’s hearts change rhythm on my ICU monitor when something is wrong. Cats meow when they’re hungry. Plants just sit there. I’ve killed a cactus plant before. Do you know how difficult it is to kill a cactus? I’m really great at killing plants. The green thumb blessed almost every other person in my family, not me. I stick to fake plants. I like them. Gives me greenery. Doesn’t wilt or attract bugs. But they don’t take in CO2 and give back O2. Fake plants don’t purify my air; they simply take up space. Do I want a friendship that simply takes up space or do I want a friendship that purifies both of our air supplies? If I choose the real friendship, I have to start putting effort into it. Feeding the soil, watering, but not over watering, giving the right amount of sunlight. In a way, plants are easier than people. I can look up online the exact amount of water, sunlight, type of food, any given plant needs. What does my friendship need? What does my friend need? What do I need? How do we come together with both of those needs? Answers appreciated.